Just Ask

After a lot of discussion I decided the best thing for me right now was to drop the class and I'm not ashamed at that. Bottom line, I'm a full time college student and that's what matters right now. For this semester I made a promise that I would start doing the smaller steps I'd always avoid.
Overall I'm relieved and ready to focus on my online courses.

The morning I dropped the classes I knew I had to have a backup plan to make sure I could get into some online. Turns out there are a lot of late start classes so I browsed, and browsed, and browsed. I must have gone through the list 20 times. In the end I FINALLY signed up for Adobe Photoshop (online) and College Strategies. The cool thing was that my healthful living class was a two month class and so was the college strategies to when I was done with health I'd start the strategies class. The bummer was they were cram classes so more work. Either way I would be at home in a comfy environment so who the hell was I to complain.

I will admit though I had....quite a meltdown the second day of my online classes.
I basically tried to do a crap load of work in one day thinking I could handle it and didn't ask anyone for help. Big mistake, I completely overloaded myself the first couple days and pretty much went into a mental breakdown, Major mental breakdown. I can't remember the last time I'd felt That depressed. I couldn't figure out what was wrong with me. One night I was sitting on my bedroom floor crying. I started hyperventilating. I've only had two panic attacks this bad in my life, the last one was in 7th grade.

I eventually explained what was going on to mum and dad. It was a hard talk but in the end I felt way better and they made me realize that I was just simply overwhelmed and unorganized. They are always there to talk to and make me feel better even when we'd argue.
I finally slept that night and realized that help is always around....You just had to ask.